Whatever Mistakes May Come
by CallMeAlice1
Summary: If Mike can't concentrate, get past all the jumbled mess in his head and find clarity then he can't do his job. He finds a fix for it, one Harvey hates and is determined to get him off of. Harvey needs to fix Mike. He has to.


Mike can mostly certainly admit that he has a problem. But this problem settles another unease, distraction. And he thinks Harvey hated distraction more than his nasty little habit. But having to do this still upset him.

Mike glumly pushed Harvey's office door open, looking upset and ragged. Harvey knew that look. That desperate, needy look mixed with fear and distaste of himself. Harvey's eyes flickered down to his laptop again as he ignored Mike. This wasn't that easy. He had to ask, otherwise there was no discipline in it. Harvey was going to give it to him, hand it over on a fucking silver platter, but Mike had to be a grown up and ask for it. He exited out of the word processor on his screen the background picture of him, Mike, Donna, and Jessica cozied up on a couch in his apartment laughing like hell on his birthday displayed, letting him know that even though Mike may think he's still working and there for ignoring his associate, Mike honestly has his undivided attention. Nothing was more important. "Harvey." Mike whispered. Harvey rolled his eyes up to Mike, one eyebrow raised, hoping to scare him into not doing this. Harvey lied to himself daily, thinking 'he's come so far in the last couple of months, and the night was almost over, he could make it a few more hours'. Mike's eyes locked on Harvey's and Harvey swore he looked like a deer in headlights. "Harvey, I need it." He finally mumbled.

Harvey closed his eyes, fighting to keep his self-control. They had made a pact, Harvey would ease him off of this, but if he asked for it, Harvey would give it to him. But when Harvey realized that Mike was getting better much too slow, if at all, he had started to second guess not throwing him in a hospital where professionals could help him. But he couldn't. Mike was his friend.

Harvey got up and walked over to his cabinet under the shelves of records, unlocked it with a small key that only he and donna had a copy of, and produced a single razor blade, and turned to face Mike again, who was practically vibrating with need. Harvey knew this was disgusting, but he'd rather do this then walk in on Mike cutting himself with sharpened paper clips or scissors or anything else just as awful and then leaving it unattended, like it wasn't a big deal, like it wasn't a _huge fucking_ deal. This was better than that. And at least now Mike wasn't doing this alone. Mike quickly undid his belt and unclipped and unzipped his pants, pulling them down to just below his knee, showing off his thighs, which even in Harvey's straight opinion would be beautiful if nasty scars and new cuts weren't marking almost all of the exposed skin.

Harvey pushed him back onto the couch. "You know Mike," he started, trying to act strong as he kneeled down between Mike's knees, looking for an abandoned part of untarnished skin to mark Mike on. "We're going to have to find another way. Some other way to clear away the clutter in that brain of yours. You can't go back to smoking pot, so that's out of the question. Everyone you could've hooked up with you have issues with now…" Mike glared at him, part of that was his fault "so that won't work either, which is sad cause sex is a great distraction. You're already moving toward a path of alcoholism, which is our next abuse to tackle, by the way." Harvey finally found a spot, right above his knee, he took in a deep breath and pressed the blade against the exposed skin. He looked up into Mike's eyes, watching him shudder like he was getting the best damn blow job he'd ever gotten before his eyes settled on Harvey. Harvey's hand hadn't moved yet. He was giving Mike a chance to back out, to rethink this.

"Harvey. Please, just do it. We'll figure it out, I'm getting better."

"No you aren't, your fixes have been getting more frequent this week, I think you just tried to hold out today to throw me off."

"Harvey. You said if I asked you to you'd do it. I'm asking, so do it." Harvey held his gaze for a moment before he complied and tore into Mike's flesh. He watched Mike tilt his head back shivering and cursing softly, the color washed back into his face and when he looked back down at Harvey, who was already holding a peroxide soaked clean cloth over the wound his eyes seemed more alert and steady. They didn't speak. Mike waited while Harvey bandaged up the new wound, nothing fancy, just a quick wrap. And then he waited as Harvey massaged the muscle around the cut, Mike knew it kept Harvey from feeling like he was ruining his associate because of the after care, but he didn't like this part, the part where he knew that Harvey couldn't stand to look at him like this. The part where he knew all too clearly that this hurt Harvey. Harvey's dragging voice entered his mind 'I'm against _having_ emotions' he remembered him saying and even back then Mike knew Harvey was lying and called him out on it, now he didn't bring it up and if questioned he lied on Harvey's behalf, no Harvey did not have emotions. But really in the back of Mike's mind he just didn't want to make Harvey any more vulnerable than he has by forcing his hand into this.

"All done." Harvey said, standing up and extending his hand to Mike. Mike was so close to him when he stood and Harvey quickly pulled Mike's pants up around his waist, leaving Mike's shirt untidy under the pants as he zipped and clipped them, and then buckled his belt. Harvey straightened mike's shirt, pushing his hands inside Mike's pants to sooth the ruffles-make it lay flat and as his hands worked their way around Mike's body to the back, if he accidently rubbed his hands over Mike's ass (which really wasn't meant to mean anything and kind of made Harvey hate himself when a flash of something that at any other moment would make him want to throw up ran through his mind) and if Mike canted his hips forward a little and ground them against Harvey's and gave a small mewl of approval, then it was a first time thing and something Harvey immediately regretted as he pulled his hands back out of Mike's pants.

Harvey hadn't known that Mike was into guys, it wasn't all the surprising or anything, but he hadn't _known. _But, the moment Mike's eyes slipped shut when Harvey's hands had been adjusting his shirt and he practically _moaned_ Harvey realized Mike swung both ways and tried to put some space between them. Harvey actually _didn't_ swing both ways. Although if anyone could make him… it'd be Mike. Mike looked around the office, seeming embarrassed by what had just happened, but looking put together again in seconds. Harvey always straightened his shirt more correctly than Mike did. "We have to find another way." Harvey said softly and mike just stared.

"Thank you." He whispered before turning around and leaving the office. Harvey hated himself. He should have turned him into a psych ward. Harvey walked back over to his desk and looked at the brochure for _Metal Haven_, a ward dedicated directly to dealing with cutting, for the umpteenth time before finally tearing it up and throwing it away. He couldn't lock Mike up. Harvey wouldn't even know where to send money to take care of Mike's grandmother and although Donna could find out, he just… no, he couldn't lock the kid up.

Harvey sat down, the sky black outside his windows, the clock on his monitor reading 11:37 pm, and his eyes stung with a sudden trace of tears that he quickly blinked away before closing his laptop, grabbing his briefcase and leaving, passing Mike, who had just sat down at his cubicle and was now immersed in files and paper work that had to be done by morning. He'd be there till about two o'clock.

Harvey understood sort of. Mike had a lot in his head, sometimes it was too much to push through, he needed something to clear his mind and the pain apparently did that for him. Harvey remembered the time he had compared it to an ecstasy high, just everything became more sharp and easier and he could drown out all of the thoughts and just focus on what's in front of him. So Harvey sort of understood. Sort of.

Three nights later Harvey was woken up at three in the morning by a banging on his door. "Harvey!" Mike called. It took Harvey a minute to actually get out of bed, pull on some boxers and make it to the front door, before immediately pulling Mike inside the condo. "Shut up, Mike, I have neighbors." Mike stared. "Sort of." Mike rolled his eyes and that's when Harvey realized it was actually three in the morning and Mike had been violently banging on his door and shouting his name and… this wasn't a social call, he needed a fix. "Come on, Mike, you went a whole day without it…"

"I'm not going to ask for that, I wanna try something different." Mike interrupted. Harvey raised his eyebrows, a bit of hope springing to life in his belly, "the other day, you were trying to figure something out and you were talking about it out loud while you were… well, you know… and you mentioned sex, but then you were all, 'but you don't have anyone to have sex with' and that's when I started thinking…" mike trailed off and Harvey's stomach kind of dropped. He assumed where this was headed.

"I don't think that's a good idea."

"Why?"

"Because Mike, I'm your boss. Not to mention, I'm not gay." Harvey dead panned.

Mike gave him an incredulous look. "A boss that does my cutting for me, knows I'm not really a lawyer, lies for me, sticks up for me, and lets me in his apartment at three in the morning without thinking twice about it. I'd say we're a little beyond boss associate relationship territory. We're friends and you know it." Harvey handed him that one.

"Still leaves the fact that I'm not gay." Harvey said turning away and walking to his kitchen, feeling Mike's presence close behind.

"I'm not asking you to be." Mike muttered. "I'm asking you to do something slightly less horrible than cutting me and instead…" Harvey leaned against the counter and looked mike in the eyes as his boy said "fuck me." Harvey had to admit that his stomach gave a little pitch, and it wasn't really that awful. Mike was pretty, he guessed. And maybe if Mike didn't have a penis, he could ignore the fact that he was male. But thing is, Harvey was pretty damn sure Mike had a penis.

"Mike. That's a bad idea."

"You brought up the sex thing."

"No, Mike."

"Fine, but I need a fix to finish this paper work by in the morning." He threw a large stack of folders down on the counter, something Harvey hadn't even realized he'd been holding. "So, get a knife or razor or something. I need you to do it." Harvey stood there, a little stunned. Harvey hated doing this. Mike had just offered him a possible way out of it. And it involved Harvey's absolute favorite activity, sex. But the sex was with Mike. His Mike. His Mike who was in fact a guy. And the fact that it was Mike, and he was a guy just didn't cooperate with his penis, hence it still being entirely soft. But the fact that it was Mike and Mike was his good boy had him thinking maybe he could forget about Mike being a guy. Maybe this was possible. "Harvey." Mike said breaking his train of thoughts. "I need…"

"Let's try it." Harvey cut him off.

"What?" Mike sputtered.

"If you can get me hard, I'll fuck you." Harvey said matter-of-factly. "In fact, if you can get me hard, I'm going to have to fuck you. And it'll be the best sex of your entire life." Deadpanned.

"Okay." Mike dragged out the 'a'. "You're serious?" Harvey nodded. And Mike didn't move.

"Well?" Harvey asked.

"I don't know what to do." Mike admitted. "This seems like the hardest thing I've ever done. I have to get Harvey Specter, ruler of my world and Adonis like creature who fucks super models and isn't gay hard. That's not an easy feat; I don't know where to start." Harvey rolled his eyes and pushed away from the island counter and pinned Mike between his body and the counter across the walk way that Mike had been leaning against.

"Let's start with the basics." Harvey muttered. "Initiate the kiss." Harvey ordered. After a moment Mike slowly leaned forward, pressing his lips softly against Harvey's and while Harvey felt Mike's lips on his, Mike felt a spark. A big one. How long had he wanted to do that?

After a minute of innocent kissing Mike flicked his tongue out over Harvey's lips and Harvey complied, though passively. Harvey didn't fight for dominance like Mike had imagined, hell, he wasn't even really involved in it. Just let mike do it. Mike pulled back from his lips and pushed Harvey away weakly. "Mike." Harvey started.

"Don't Harvey, I know you don't want this, which means I can't." Harvey's eyebrows furrowed. "Don't know if you noticed, but when it comes to physical stuff, I'm not that aggressive. Just grab a knife."

"Why don't we watch a movie?" Harvey suggested. "I know a great, twenty four hour pizza place."

"Harvey, knife."

"No, Mike. You want to find a way out of this too. Otherwise you wouldn't have shown up here with that ridiculous, half-baked idea that apparently I planted in your brain…" Harvey rolled his eyes at that "So, if all else fails and we can't have you completely blissed out by eight o'clock, I'll do the briefs and we'll go back to cutting and you can take the day off."

"Are you bargaining?"

"Like the god damn devil." Harvey assured.

"Fine." Mike muttered walking toward the couch as Harvey pulled out his phone to call for a pizza. Cheese in the crust. It was only three fifteen. That gave Harvey plenty of time to figure something out. And for some reason the idea of sex with Mike was now _stuck in his head_ and more than likely that's what was going to end up happening. Because Mike needed him, and when Mike really, and he means _really_ needs him, Harvey comes through for him. Always. And sex with Mike while seemingly awful and awkward and probably filled with Harvey thinking about a girl or a porno or something, he could do it if Mike needed it. The part he was having a hard time with was being the one to initiate it. If he could do that, he could make Mike be better, get better at least, and possibly get off the sharp objects for good.

Mike was stretched out on the couch, suit jacket hanging over the arm, shirt unbuttoned, tie loosened, shoes kicked off and feet propped up on the table, remote controller in his hand as he flicked through the channels. "Get up and pick out a movie." Harvey said walking into the room about twenty minutes later with a box of pizza and two beers. He sat the pizza down and placed a beer on the table in front of mike, popping his own open with a twist of his fingers. Mike got up from the couch and walked over to Harvey's movie collection. He didn't know some of the titles, but most of them, well they did have similar tastes in films.

"What are you in the mood for?" Mike asked.

"Something scary." Mike raised his eyebrow and grabbed The Exorcist off of the shelf and popped it into Harvey's DVD player as Harvey switched the channel to display the DVD screen. Mike walked back to the couch and sat down opposite Harvey, pulling a piece of pizza out of the box and shoving the pointed end into his mouth before pulling one out for Harvey and handing it to him. Harvey muttered a quick 'thanks' and hit play.

Mike liked scary movies when he was a kid. Now that he's older he _really_ likes scary movies and gets very into them, but that's a problem cause then he screams and is terrified for the rest of the night. So the first time he jumps during the movie, Harvey kind of laughs. And the second time, he turns his face into the couch and Harvey reaches over and pulls Mike toward him. The third time Mike turns his face into Harvey's shoulder. And…

Harvey smells like awesome. If awesome were a scent, it would be the way Harvey's body smells. There's no other way to describe it. It's like describing the smell of a color. Impossible.

Harvey doesn't think Mike realizes that when he grabbed Harvey's leg earlier, he had accidently left his hand lying there, on the bare skin of Harvey's thigh, because the man hadn't even attempted to get dressed, just stayed in his boxers. It was his home and his own goddamn right. And then Mike screeched and turned his face into Harvey's shoulder again and Harvey laughed boisterously. "You're such a goddamn girl." Harvey muttered. Mike had made him turn on the lamp about thirty minutes into the movie and when Mike looked up at Harvey, moving away from him slightly and sitting indian style on Harvey's couch facing Harvey's direction, he was drenched in a soft light, almost glowing.

"No I'm not," Mike muttered, glaring daggers at Harvey, "If I was a girl you wouldn't have a problem screwing me." Mike finished sounding defiant and hateful and challenging.

And Harvey loved a challenge. Got off on winning a challenge. He fucking lived for that shit. And Mike all of the sudden took on a whole new look to him, sexy. He had never, ever looked at a guy and thought, 'goddammit, I want you wrapped around me' until that very moment. And it wasn't that Mike was all that attractive to Harvey, it was his mind. His defiant, rude, obnoxious, _challenging_ mind. And Harvey moved.

Pinning Mike to the couch, he brushed his lips over the smaller mans, and moved enough to let Mike stretch out below him, Harvey's right thigh dipping down between Mike's legs. And Mike's mouth opened up, letting Harvey in, but tangling their tongues, fighting Harvey for this kiss.


End file.
